OTA - Dated 2/12
Feb. 10th, 2017 06:50 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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How do you bear it?
Curnen had never heard Peggy Goins sound so tired and broken in her life. Miss Peggy had always been vivacious and cheerful, but she was taking the murder of her husband on top of all the other recent mayhem in the Tufa community about as well as could be expected. Which was to say, not at all. Tragic love stories were not new to their people, but the murder of a loved one… well. Curnen was the last to face that, which was why she supposed the now widowed Mrs. Goins was calling her. She couldn’t remember much if anything of the conversation, but that question had stuck with her.
How do you bear it?
It had banged around in her dreams by night, and by morning the barriers that Curnen had consciously or unconsciously put between herself and her past were in splinters and everything in her that wasn’t nailed down was shaking loose--her father and her mother and her husband and her birth and her curse. She tried to go about her day. She tried to put it all away again where it was supposed to be, but there was too much, too much too fast.
How do you bear it?
Her legs gave out in the middle of the sidewalk and she fell to her knees screaming. Not crying. Screaming. Screaming fit to tear her throat raw. Her hands tangled in her hair and tore at it almost hard enough to rip it out by the fistful, and yet the pain of this did nothing to soothe the storm inside. If anything, it seemed all the more determined to make itself known, the air temperature around her dropping sharply into freezing cold.
And she screamed. And screamed. And screamed.
Curnen had never heard Peggy Goins sound so tired and broken in her life. Miss Peggy had always been vivacious and cheerful, but she was taking the murder of her husband on top of all the other recent mayhem in the Tufa community about as well as could be expected. Which was to say, not at all. Tragic love stories were not new to their people, but the murder of a loved one… well. Curnen was the last to face that, which was why she supposed the now widowed Mrs. Goins was calling her. She couldn’t remember much if anything of the conversation, but that question had stuck with her.
How do you bear it?
It had banged around in her dreams by night, and by morning the barriers that Curnen had consciously or unconsciously put between herself and her past were in splinters and everything in her that wasn’t nailed down was shaking loose--her father and her mother and her husband and her birth and her curse. She tried to go about her day. She tried to put it all away again where it was supposed to be, but there was too much, too much too fast.
How do you bear it?
Her legs gave out in the middle of the sidewalk and she fell to her knees screaming. Not crying. Screaming. Screaming fit to tear her throat raw. Her hands tangled in her hair and tore at it almost hard enough to rip it out by the fistful, and yet the pain of this did nothing to soothe the storm inside. If anything, it seemed all the more determined to make itself known, the air temperature around her dropping sharply into freezing cold.
And she screamed. And screamed. And screamed.
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Date: 2017-02-11 07:48 pm (UTC)Fuck him to hell for being right. Oh god, Curnen.
Coby dropped to his knees beside her, not feeling the cold as he wrapped his arms around her. He growled a very American, "Fuck off," to some asshole passing by as they tut-tutted the display of raw emotion. Then ignoring everything else, he held Curnen almost rocking, and began to hum under his breath, nothing familiar, a tune just starting to come together in his head.
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Date: 2017-02-12 02:02 am (UTC)She went quiet for a moment, less calmed than momentarily bewildered. And then the sobbing started instead, her whole body shuddering.
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Date: 2017-02-14 08:31 pm (UTC)What was wrong and how he could help could wait until she'd cried herself out, for the moment at least.
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Date: 2017-02-14 08:38 pm (UTC)Let it out she did. Curnen wailed for longer than she thought she'd ever been able, decades of pent of grief trying to get out all at once. Even so, her energy could not keep up with her emotion, and when she quieted it was more from exhaustion than from actual calm.
If she heard a thing he said, she didn't reply. Only made soft, almost animal noises of confusion and pain.
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Date: 2017-02-14 08:51 pm (UTC)He kept up the gentle touches, making no move to let go. "Come on. My place isn't far," he told her softly. Get her some food, something to drink, or just a safe place to rest and someone who cared until she felt more herself.
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Date: 2017-02-14 08:53 pm (UTC)Curnen nodded, the simple movement sluggish and almost dazed, but she managed to sit up and pull away from him. Getting to her feet proved to be a bit more difficult, as though she couldn't quite remember how to do it. She remembered vaguely that she should not, but something about staying on all fours felt almost comforting.
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Date: 2017-02-14 09:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-02-15 03:02 am (UTC)She looked rather like a madwoman, but she couldn't be bothered to consider let alone care about that.
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Date: 2017-02-15 05:52 am (UTC)"We'll get you some water. And something stronger if you want it," he told her, mostly just for the sound of his voice. He wasn't sure how much she was really hearing right then. "Then whatever you need I can give you."
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Date: 2017-02-13 03:59 am (UTC)Curnen was terribly easy to pick out of a crowd. Small and spritely looking- Even now while crumpled on the pavement.
"Shit," the fae said softly, pushing past the crowd and deserting his companion to get out the door and onto the street. Kneeling beside her, Fin gently caught her by the shoulders.
"Curnen? Curnen, what's wrong?" he asked, his voice low and calming.
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Date: 2017-02-13 04:18 am (UTC)She only shook her head wildly from side to side. Not that she would not answer, but that she could not.
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Date: 2017-02-13 04:30 am (UTC)His hand moved over her back in small circles, and he kept her near as he spoke softly in her ear.
"Whatever it is, it'll be alright. I promise."
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Date: 2017-02-13 04:42 am (UTC)And then she started sobbing instead, big sobs that shook her whole body, and she held on tight as thought she feared she'd fly apart entirely without him to anchor her.
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Date: 2017-02-14 10:59 am (UTC)"...Curnen?" he asked, in a quiet voice, once there was enough of a break in her screaming for him to be heard.
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Date: 2017-02-14 04:39 pm (UTC)Curnen didn't hear him. Certainly, she didn't react in any way to indicate that she had, but with blood roaring in her ears and the maelstrom of her mind, she just about couldn't hear him and only wailed again, doubling over against the pavement.
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Date: 2017-02-14 10:23 pm (UTC)He hesitated a moment then came closer, crouching down next to her.
"Curnen?" he said again, louder.
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Date: 2017-02-15 02:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-02-23 07:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-02-23 03:49 pm (UTC)Her eyes were wide, panicked, and had gone full black.
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Date: 2017-02-23 09:36 pm (UTC)He stayed very, very still.
"Curnen?" he said, again, hoping she would hear him this time.
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Date: 2017-02-24 04:04 am (UTC)(no subject)
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