OTA

[london_spy]

He'd come into the new year clean, and intended to do his best to stay that way. More importantly, he was back on his medication and back to eating regular meals- Not that it seemed to be helping much. Some damage couldn't be undone easily though, and Danny was still painfully underweight. Worse still, he was a bit under the weather, and couldn't get in to see his doctor until the end of the month.

It was just a bug, that's what he kept telling himself- And only himself. He didn't want to worry Hex with this, the other man had already gone through so much because of him. Had put up with so much...

He'd pushed himself through a job interview that morning, and was supposed to stop off for groceries next, but a dizzy spell had nearly left him flat on the pavement. So instead he'd wandered into a small cafe, ordering a cup of tea and a sandwich before settling into the last booth in the corner. His hand trembled every time he lifted his mug, and he knew he looked a little pale. 

"It's fine," he whispered to himself. "You're fine. It's fine..."

Taking a calming breath, he lifted his cup again, his hand shaking so hard this time that it fell from his fingers. It bounced off the table, rolling a little before smashing on the floor, coating the shoes of a person walking past.

"Sorry- Shit, I'm so sorry," he said, reaching for some napkins as he spoke.

Comments

[old_man_gavril]

"Hey, it's no worries," Gavril said, looking down at his shoes. Nothing a little wipe-down wouldn't fix. He sat down in an empty chair to take some napkins and wipe off his own shoes.

"You okay?" he asked, once he was a little more level with the guy. He was shaking pretty badly. Maybe it was a blood sugar issue, or worse, maybe the guy was on drugs...

[london_spy]

"Fine," Danny replied, holding out the napkins he'd already grabbed in offering. "I'm just- A bit under the weather."

An understatement, obviously, but Danny didn't know what else to tell a stranger.

"I really am sorry though."

[old_man_gavril]

"Like I said, it's fine," Gavril said, more concerned about this guy than his shoes. "These boots have been through worse." He took the napkins, though, to finish off wiping his boots off.

But as far as 'a bit under the weather' went, the guy looked like he was about ready to pass out or something.

"You sure you're okay? I mean, I don't have a car, but I can escort you to a hospital or something, if you're feeling as bad as you look. No offense," he added.

[london_spy]

"No, no I- I um..."

I'm HIV positive, and today's a bad day.

"My immune system's just a bit shot. I think I'm coming down with something, but- It's fine, I'm fine. I'm going to see a doctor soon. I just needed to sit a while."

[alcuin]

"It's fine," Alcuin said automatically, "here, I'll help - " And only as he reached for the napkins as well did he realize that he knew the person who had dropped the cup. "... Danny."

He hadn't seen the man since their chance encounter in the supermarket. The whole thing had been awkward, leaving Alcuin feeling as if he had intruded on the man's life. And in retrospect, his attempt to seek some kinship in their shared painful circumstances was probably misguided. Which made the timing of seeing him again particularly vexing, as it brought up a flood of unpleasant associations.

Danny didn't look well. Neither did Alcuin, though it was nothing in comparison, just bags under his eyes and wrinkled clothes and a poor pallor - from stress, not illness.

[london_spy]

The boy from the supermarket, Danny couldn't recall his name, but he remembered their meeting quite vividly.

"...Here," he said awkwardly, holding the napkins out in offering. "I'm sorry," he said again.

[alcuin]

"It's fine," Alcuin repeated, and took the napkins from him, bending down to wipe the tea off of his shoes, and then mopping up a bit on the floor between the shattered cup. "We should ask them for a broom, I don't want anyone cutting themselves on the pieces."

[london_spy]

Danny nodded, unsteady as he tried to get to his feet- Only to see a girl from behind the counter rushing over with a mop. She was lovely, insisting she get him a fresh cup as she cleaned up the mess- But it only made Danny feel even more useless as she left.

His hand was still shaking, and he clenched it as he tried to still it.

[alcuin]

"Are you all right?" Alcuin asked, looking down at his shaking hand. He started to reach out to put a hand on his arm, but then thought better of it.

[london_spy]

"I'm a bit under the weather," Danny confessed, and it wasn't a lie, though it wasn't the whole truth.

"My immune system is... Not very good."

[alcuin]

Alcuin hesitated and then said, "You ah, you told me when we met. I apologize, maybe that was a stupid question. I meant more in the immediate."

[london_spy]

"...I have an appointment coming up with my doctor. I was off my medication for a while, and I'm still adjusting to being back on my regiment," Danny confessed.

[alcuin]

Alcuin nodded, not really sure what to say. "Have you been... better, otherwise?" Alcuin asked. After all, the last time he'd seen him it was, what, maybe a week after his lover had died?

[london_spy]

"Yes, and no," Danny replied, raking his fingers through his hair. "I lost my best friend, but I also met someone. ...We're living together now."

He'd never thought there'd be anyone after Alex.

[alcuin]

Alcuin's expression was one of conflicted relief. It was almost nice to have the reminder that there was life after. He knew it, from before. At first he barely thought he could go on living, after Anafiel. Today was the first day he'd ventured out of his flat since Hannibal's death, so maybe running into Danny was meant as some kind of reminder.

"I'm glad to hear you've found someone who makes you happy," he said, managing a little smile.

[london_spy]

"Thank you. ...I'm lucky. I think Hex may be the only reason I'm still alive," Danny admitted, offering a tired smile, then pushing his hair back out of his face.

"I feel like I should apologise for our first meeting," he added after a moment. "...Not that this one has been much better. At least last time I didn't splash hot tea on you."

[alcuin]

"Please don't apologize," Alcuin said, though his voice was a bit small. "You'd been through a lot and I doubt I was much help." At least that photo of them someone had taken hadn't gone viral or anything; Alcuin would have felt terrible.

[old_man_gavril]

"Okay, well, y'know. No need to get anxious or anything," Gavril assured him. He wasn't worried about contracting human illness; Gavril had never been ill in his life. "That'll probably just make it worse, yeah? Anyway, I'm Gavril." It was one of his days the pub was closed and he was off, so he had nothing better to do than sit and talk to a stranger.

[london_spy]

"I just didn't want to wind up in the press again," Danny said quietly. "I was so close to- Well, it doesn't matter. I thought I was about to expose something huge and important, but in the end nothing came of it. The world wasn't terribly interested in what I had to say."

[london_spy]

"Danny," he replied, studying the man curiously with eyes that saw more than most people expected them to. Danny wore the face of a young man who'd not treated himself well. Gaunt, pale, with lines and marks born from years of clubbing and drugs, rather than age. Cleaning up his act hadn't faded them at all.

"I'm not anxious though. I don't know what's causing the shaking. ...Side effect of my medication, for all I know."

[alcuin]

"I understand," Alcuin said, because he did. "And I'm sorry to hear that." He had never gotten anywhere trying to find Anafiel's killer either. But somehow this time he felt even more of a thirst for some kind of justice, for Hannibal. He'd known Anafiel had enemies, known what kind. This was different.

[london_spy]

Danny shrugged one lean shoulder, offering a tired and weak looking smile.

"I tried, that's something. ...And at least I know the truth, I suppose."

[old_man_gavril]

Gavril wasn't one to judge a man by his looks. He was just more or less concerned about the guy and all the shaking. Shaking wasn't ever a good thing.

"That's ... definitely something to talk to a doctor about," Gavril said, nodding. And the winner for 'Most Useless Thing Said' goes to...

"Look, I got nothing planned today. You need someone to walk you home once you're done?" he asked, gesturing to the unfinished sandwich.

[alcuin]

"It's something, at least," Alcuin said with a small smile.

"You mentioned you were looking for work, the last time we met," he said, remembering. "Ah, have you had any luck?"

[london_spy]

"I'll be fine, really," Danny assured him. "I just- I just need some caffeine in me. I don't want to head home yet, the boyfriend will worry if I turn up looking like this."