OTA

[kersen]

Kersen sometimes did this thing where when he was feeling his worst, he tried to look his best. Elaborate drag when he was the most down, for example. Like maybe he could force cheerfulness with sequins and lipstick.

This time, he couldn't seem to muster up the energy for drag, though. What "look" said 'I just found out a lover is a serial killer'? Particularly coupled with 'what does this say about my taste in men'? Finally, he'd just gone with the forced cheerfulness: dark purple leather pants and a shirt (gifted to him by an employee years ago) that read OF COURSE I'M PRO-GAY, DO YOU THINK I WORK THIS HARD TO BE AN AMATEUR GAY in bright rainbow colors.

... also he'd started smoking again. Which was a little ironic since he was pretty sure that any effect they had on him was purely psychosomatic.

However, at the moment he was having a smoke break outside his bar. It was fairly early yet, just past 9pm. The streets were still full, lively with people leaving restaurants and shops, heading into bars and theaters. He liked this time of night, where the world was still alive. Wished he could experience more of it.

Some asshole walking by threw a homophobic slur at him, and he was briefly, stupidly tempted to flash his fangs as a threat. Instead he said, "The most fabulous you'll ever see, honey," and flicked the cigarette to the ground. Luckily it was the cowardly sort of asshole, and he just stuck up his middle finger and kept walking.

Comments

[kersen]

Kersen smiled at her, almost a touch embarrassed. "I think you may overestimate my appeal," he said fondly. "But... yes, you're right about that last part, I suppose. What are your fantasies, Angelique?"

[utterly_mysterious]

"Well, a number of them are... physically impossible, I'm afraid," Angelique said with a brief glance away. She liked her body, and was quite attached to and enamoured with the equipment granted her by nature, but still, there were times she dreamed she could know what other women felt, physically. It just wasn't a permanent step she wanted to take.

"But I have a bit of a thing for outdoor sports. Nothing so tawdry as an alley," she was quick to point out. "I mean more... full moons, sultry summer nights in an empty meadow. The breeze on your skin, nothing between you and the sky."

[kersen]

Kersen wondered if he ought to tell her someday about the week he'd spent as a woman, after Will had changed him on a lark. He felt awkward telling her, because it had been so upsetting for him.

So for right now he just said, "Well I admit, I'm relieved that you prefer the night to the day."

[utterly_mysterious]

"Maybe I'll find us a a nice empty meadow some night," Angelique suggested, but she was still playful, still grinning secretly, just for Kersen.

[kersen]

Kersen smiled at her, and then said, "Come on, let's go sing." He slid hopped back onto the bar and over, then offered his hand.

[utterly_mysterious]

Laughing, Angelique placed her hand in Kersen's and hopped off her bar stool. She was bringing her drink with her, though; a little liquid confidence could only enhance her performance.

[kersen]

The bar patrons were not paying them a great deal of attention as they made their way to the piano, and Kersen slid onto the bench, leaving room for Angelique.

He put his hands to the keys and played the first few lines before starting to sing. "My lover's got humor..."

[utterly_mysterious]

Angelique waited just one line to learn the tempo and key that Kersen sang in, and joined him on the next. Though she couldn't play herself, she sat near him and kept out of the way of his arms and hands, but traced her fingers across the ivory of the upper, unused, keys like stroking a lover's skin.

Her voice was low, but sweet, with a smoky edge that she couldn't quite smooth out. Nothing breath-taking, but very good, if untrained. Now and then she would catch Kersen's eye, and go quiet for a phrase, then pick up again, trading lines back and forth like a duet when it seemed a good effect.

[kersen]

Kersen liked Angelique's voice very much, and he enjoyed their duet quite a bit. He smiled at her a few times when she caught his eye, and when they finished, there was a smattering of applause.

"Come," he said, and offered her his hand. "Let's have another drink in private."

[utterly_mysterious]

The song was so slow, rich, and sexy, that by the end of it -- her voice twining with Kersen's through such intimate words -- Angelique was more than ready to take Kersen off for some privacy. She slid her hand warmly into his, and squeezed it with a slow smile, full of promise. "I think that's the most fabulous idea I've ever heard."

[kersen]

Kersen led her through the crowd and to his apartment downstairs. Being with Angelique felt so refreshingly uncomplicated. (Well, aside from some lingering confusion around his own sexuality.) No vampires. No murder. No drama.

"Wine?" he suggested.

[utterly_mysterious]

"Does it come with a side of you?" Angelique asked teasingly, tugging herself closer by her hand in his. She leaned in and kissed the corner of his mouth, warm, but not too lingering. "You look utterly devastating like this, you know. I adore you in drag, but right now, defying the line between gender? You're positively delectable. I wish I could pull it off half as well."

Which was, admittedly, a very long answer to a very short question.

[kersen]

"Am I that androgynous even without the heavy eye makeup?" Kersen laughed, but he clearly didn't mind. "You make me feel positively manly, my dear, and that's saying a lot." He pulled away from her only so that he could pull out a bottle of red wine from the cabinet, uncork it, and pour two glasses.

[utterly_mysterious]

Angelique took off her hat, at last, setting it aside on a table. She ran her fingers through her hair, and followed Kersen at a slight distance and relaxed pace. "Do you mind?" she asked curiously. "That is, would you like it if I were a bit more manly? If I wore boy's clothes and less makeup?"

[kersen]

Kersen turned and handed her one of the glasses. "Of course I don't mind," he said. "You're beautiful however you're dressed."

He hesitated visibly then, wanting to be honest with her. "But I won't lie to you... it isn't that I'm not attracted to you like this, you know that. But when you're more androgynous, or masculine, it's - the more rip your clothes off kind of attraction. I hope that doesn't bother you."

Kersen was still, after all, a gay man. He wasn't doubting that. Perhaps it was slightly more fluid than he realized, but he still was not actually attracted to women.

[utterly_mysterious]

Angelique listened over sips of the wine, drinking in his honesty gladly as well. "I work hard on those clothes, so I'm just a bit glad you don't rip them off," she answered with a touch of humor, because it was her way to tease and flirt. Still, honesty deserved honesty in return.

"I think I'd like to inspire that kind of attraction in you," she admitted, taking a hip-swaying step closer to him. "Would you like me to try?"

[kersen]

Kersen hadn't been certain how she would react. This wasn't entirely expected, and so he wasn't sure how to answer. "I..." He sounded a touch unsure. "Yes. I mean. If you want to."

[utterly_mysterious]

Angelique didn't know how she would react, either, but in her estimation, it was always better to know than to wonder. If she never tried to show Kersen a side of herself that he could desire on an entirely new level, she would always wonder. How might Kersen react? How might Angelique react? How might she -- he-- enjoy being wanted without makeup, without artifice?

Now she had to know.

"Make yourself comfortable. Give me a few minutes in your lav, and... we'll see what happens. Hm?"

[kersen]

Kersen found himself strangely anxious as well. "Take all the time you like," he said, and offered her a little smile before moving to pour himself another glass of wine.

[utterly_mysterious]

Angelique took her own glass with her, and slipped away to the bathroom with it.

She spent some time there, looking at herself in the mirror for a few moments -- the old legend about vampires casting no reflection must be a myth, then -- before seeking out a cloth and some soap from among the cabinets and drawers. The makeup washed away easily, with care not to leave anything behind. She slid out of her long vest and top, removed her jewelry, and took off her shoes, folding and piling everything neatly on the commode. Then, she unpinned a few of her curls, and ran her fingers through her hair so it swept back from her face and curled against her slim, square shoulders.

Some minutes later, the young man who emerged shirtless, barefoot, wearing just a pair of very skinny jeans, bore a striking resemblance to Angelique, but glanced shyly at the floor before looking up for Kersen's reaction.

[kersen]

He was gorgeous. Well formed. Still somewhat androgynous. Though the shyness, that did not seem like Angelique.

There was no mistaking the desire in Kersen's expression when he first saw. But still, he stayed put, not moving closer. Looking then a bit unsure. "You're gorgeous. But I - I don't want to make you feel - " Kersen was sensitive to people wanting him for something other than him. He'd been with men who wanted a woman. He didn't like it.

[utterly_mysterious]

"You can't make me feel any way I don't decide to feel," he said, and that was the Angelique Kersen knew. Unafraid, certain, with a spine of steel beneath the graceful silk of white skin and ebony hair.

When Angelique had seen a kindred spirit in Kersen, had suggested they might understand each other in ways other people didn't, it had been because of this. This exactly. Kersen knew how to look beyond presentation and appearance, and see the person beneath. Angelique had never been quite so bare before him -- even now, still half clothed.

"It's only that I don't usually let anyone see me without my face," he added, and began to move toward Kersen with a gentle little sway of hips. "I feel a little... exposed."

[kersen]

Kersen moved towards him as well, meeting him partway and sliding his arms around his waist. "I like it," he said softly, and leaned in to inhale his scent. "And I'm pleased that you trust me with this."

[utterly_mysterious]

In Kersen's arms, he softened, draping his arms around Kersen's shoulders and tipping back his head. A shiver ran down Angelique's back despite the warm room, the warm touch. How strange it felt to live again in the skin he was born with, the body that never seemed to fit quite right... but Kersen understood that Angelique was more than just a body, more than makeup or skirts or high-heeled shoes.

"I want you to know me. Really... know me."

[kersen]

Kersen trailed his fingers down Angelique's bare back.

"Tell me how," he said quietly.