Saturnalia GP!

[goodfellow]

It was a good night at Saturnalia.

There was some b-list American rapper-slash-DJ who had shown up earlier in the day, and Robin was happy to throw someone on stage. It had gone over well right away, so he'd let him stay on. And now it was well into the evening and things were, as Robin understood the current vernacular to be, turnt.

In fact, at some point he'd thrown open all the windows so that the music blasted onto the street, and instructed the bouncers to let in whoever wanted in. He'd also instructed the bartenders to serve all the beer half price. The resulting crowd and frenzy was really something else.

Comments

[london_spy]

"You don't think 'shutting it off' makes it worse?" Danny asked- As though asking for permission.

[just_hex]

"Maybe sometimes...but you can't run on high all the time, Danny. You've got to find some sort of safety valve or you'll explode," he said. He'd rather it be running or meditation, but that wasn't a suggestion he'd make at the club.

[london_spy]

"I know. ...I know," Danny said softly. "And I know it's- I know I shouldn't. Because I'm sick, because of your job... I know, just- It's so hard sometimes, Hex. I was doing so well, and then- The whole world just went to shit. ...And it's better, I'm better with you, I am, but- It's harder now. Knowing what I know about the world. Knowing it doesn't matter what I do. It's harder to keep myself on the path."

[just_hex]

"It's hell to feel...small. Insignificant," he sympathized. He'd felt the same those first weeks in the TARDIS. Facing the immensity of the universe, knowing he was nothing. But then he'd become a part of something so big.

"...I think you need a purpose, Danny. Some good work to do. Doesn't have to be a job. You've got the dosh, you could volunteer. Do some good."

[london_spy]

"Maybe- I don't think I'm in a good place for it though. I need- I don't know," Danny sighed, raking his fingers through his hair.

[just_hex]

"I think you need to get out of here," Hex said. "That's a start. Let's go outside. You can smoke and we can cool off a bit."

[london_spy]

Danny nodded a little, thinking some cool air and a smoke sounded like a good idea.

[just_hex]

Hex lead the way outside, parting the crowd for Danny on the way. Once outside the air was brisk compared to inside and he took a deep breath.

"There we are. Better already," he said, falling back so he could slip his arm around Danny.

[london_spy]

"Thank you," Danny said softly, leaning in and resting against Hex.

[just_hex]

He held Danny a bit tighter as if the strength of his embrace could help banish the dark, creeping thoughts. Hex pressed a kiss to Danny's temple.

"I'll call a car while you smoke. We'll get out of here. Fancy a bite? Or we can go home. I'm famished but there's plenty to cook at home."

[london_spy]

"Let's just go home," Danny sighed. "Home sounds good, Hex."

[just_hex]

Hex nodded and pulled up the app to call a driver. It took no time at all, really.

"Looks like five minutes. Plenty of time for a cigarette," he said as he reached out to stroke Danny's arm.

[london_spy]

Danny didn't reach for his cigarettes though, he reached for Hex, pulling him closer and kissing him softly.

[just_hex]

He closed his eyes and melted into it. Arms encircled Danny to pull him close and Hex tilted his head so he could enjoy the brush of the other man's lips

[london_spy]

"I love you," Danny said softly, exhaling against the other man's lips, "I love you, Hex."

[just_hex]

"Oh, Danny, I know. I know. I love you too," he replied, so close his lips kept brushing Danny's mouth as he spoke.

[london_spy]

"You could do so much better though, Hex. You should have someone good- Someone normal. Healthy. You should have someone who can sleep through the night without terror, who isn't putting you at risk every time you make love," Danny whispered.

[just_hex]

"Now you just shut that up right this instant," he said sternly as he pulled back to look at Danny. "I don't want anyone else. I love you. You, do you understand? I see you as you are and I want you. As you are."

[london_spy]

"You're a bloody fool, you know that?" Danny accused quietly, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. "I love you, I just- I want good things for you, Hex."

[just_hex]

"You're a good thing. You're the best thing," he said, pulling Danny in again. "I love you and I want this life with you. I'm no fool. I never asked for it to be easy."

[london_spy]

"Not asking for it doesn't mean you don't deserve it," Danny replied, letting out a soft sigh.

[just_hex]

"I deserve a lot of things. I deserve a hundred million pounds and a butler. I get by without, though," he joked, giving Danny a little shake, then hugging him. "I deserve a man as good and as honest as you, Danny. No one I've ever been with gave a shit what I deserved."

[london_spy]

Danny looked distraught, but when Hex pulled him in for a hug, he melted against him.

"I just know you deserve better. That's all, Hex. ...That's all," he said quietly, embracing the other man in return.

[just_hex]

"Hush now," he said. "I don't want to hear any more of that."

Hex rubbed Danny's back in slow circles. Yes, there was sickness, and terrors, and moods. But Danny failed to see the way Hex looked at him while he was asleep, or planned out meals he knew Danny could keep down when he wasn't feeling well, or how Hex kept meticulous records of Danny's vitals from every appointment. It was love, plain and simple, and Hex vowed to see this through to the end.

[london_spy]

"One day I'm not going to be fun anymore, Hex. I know the meds are better now, I know there's hope, but- Let's be realistic. ...One day, I'm not going to be okay," Danny whispered. "Promise me when that day comes, you wont sit and watch me rot. ...You'll move on."